Now for something a little different

I am Back and now able to see out of both eyes again. Its good to have depth perception once more. Well anyway we
First off, Recently my lovely sub-wife made a purchase...and quite a good one too. A book by the Two Knotty Boys called Showing You the Ropes. Its a Terrible pun but a really good book that describes and demonstrates how to preform decorative, Dominance, and Sexual bondage. Though Ive always been interested in rope bondage but found it too difficult. Thanks to this book Ive changed my opinion somewhat. We have tried a few of the more simple techniques and I'm finding it very exciting as well as an effective way of keeping my lady love well in hand.
On another note, my arse-enal of spanking implements has drastically increased this week. Most impressively a lovely wicked thin rattan cane. The marks it leaves are delicious and left my little miss in ecstasy....I always knew that marrying a masochist was a good idea. Our second toy was a standard round wooden paddle. Like so many paddles you find in Sex Shops this one is wooden on one side and fuzzy on the other. The fuzzy side makes for some nice teasing and the wood gives the great wood against bottom sound that we love so much. the little miss says that the pain from the paddle pales in comparison to the cane but it does have its charms and gives nice coverage across her bottom.
One more note for the evening is that my lovley sub-wife has decided that it is time to find us a girlfriend. She has taken the first steps in the search for a girl. It may be difficult to find someone to live up to her exacting standards. This girl is to be a junior submissive. Thus my subbie will not activly dominate this girl, but this girl will be of lower station than my wife. I really dont have preconcieved notions of what to look for in a girlfirend. Im just happy that we are looking for one. But as this it to be mandi's girlfriend as well, Ill let most of the sellection process up to her. Wish us luck. BTW Thank you to all the kind words and well wishes from everyone during my illness. You people are all so kind and we appreciate it very much.

What to do when you cant all out spank

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Shame versus Humiliation

Two themes that feature prominantly in the BDSM lifestyle are shame and humiliation. Though the two themes may seem interchangeable, in my humble opinion their uses are both very different in their purposes and applications.

Shame is feelings of remorse and regret due to ones actions. Lets say there is a brat who has, as brats tend to do, been quite the handful and is getting on the nerves of her Spanker. This brat has had a verbal outburst at her Dominant. Imidiately after her statement she regrets it....unless she is an espically problem brat. The actions of the Dominant will decide what happens next. There should be true consequences to this action weither those consequences physical or only mental is a decision that should be made carfully. The instant reaction is to take the spiteful brat, up her skirt, down her panties, and redden her bottom as she most certainly deserves. This spanking may only reinforce her feelings of being wronged and encourage more annimosity. The other more calculated response is to let it sink in that she has dissappointed her Dominant or at least crossed a line that she should no better. The mind games that follow that reinforce her remorse push her to feel the shame that she should feel for this infraction. Shame, perhaps even more than pain is the most important tool of the Dominant when it comes to behavior modification.

I believe that Humiliation has an important place in both Disciplinary and concensual BDSM relationships. While a Master/Dom/Sir/Spanker can use humiliation to break down the brat/sub/slave/littlemiss in addition to punnishment, but for the consenting sub, humiliation is a tool that can be used to test the depths of their submission and devotion. A submissive who wants to serve and to please her Dominant needs to accept the humiliation that is placed upon her. Her acceptance and endurance of humiliation is a way of showing her devotion and desire to please and obey. Ive used humiliation of varrious degrees in my domination of my sub/wife. Though Ive not taken it to the extremes that have crossed my mind, I know that my littlemiss would endure because her desire to obey and her love for me. I am very lucky and very proud.

A history of....

I frequently ask myself why I enjoy spanking women. While there are more than one answer to this question, one of the reasons is quite simply, because I can. When I take a woman across my lap (or bed, etc) they have given me control, or in some cases I have taken it. The spanking, the sound, the feel, the motion of the spankee is all wonderful, but having that control if a true rush for me. Really gets the blood pumping.
Prior to meeting my lovley wife, I spanked a few girlfriends only briefly. The first of these allowed me to spank her primarily as an indulgence to me. This ofcourse only created the desire to take things further. The few more casual encounters that I had between relationships could barely be considered spankings and more the firm slap upon the ass as foreplay or during sex. Perhaps because the brevity of said encounter more than a lack of interest, I never began properly spanking those ladies.
As discussed in earlier posts and mandi's blog... the spankin of my lovley submissive wife is a reaffirmation of our relationship. What began with a guaged slap on the ass became her giving me her will and trust freely. On other occasions, more coercive actions must be taken. Samantha was the best friend of my wife while they were in high school. A lovley girl who had a true submissive streak that she was not yet willing to admit to. Samantha was dating a close friend of mine and thus W/we got to spend a great deal of time together. Occasionally Samantha's inner brat would come out and I caved to the temptation to take matters into my own hands....my left palm to be more precise. On more than one occasion, I pulled Samantha across my lap and raised her short skirts that she had a tendency to wear. I would give her a few slaps across her bottom while she wiggled and half heartedly resisted. Afterwards I would give a brief admonishment and enjoy her looks of embarassment. My then girlfriend/now wife enjoyed seeing these little episodes as much as I enjoyed initiating them.
This taking of control was very much the opposite of what I do with my submissive wife. But where true differences between the two spankings the rush of power and control that I felt were very much the same. The feeling was addictive and it has shaped me as the Dominant I am. Some of these ideas will be further expounded upon in upcoming blogs. I hope youll enjoy hearing about them as much as I am enjoying talking about them.

In the Begining

In the Begining there was mandi and John. One evening as we were making love I worked up the courage to give mandi a firm slap across her bottom. Her reaction was exactly what I wanted, a moan and a desire for more. From there we began this relationship of ours
Early in our relationship W/we both had a desire to at some kink and bdsm into our relationship.
Near our begining there was a friend of ours who had gotten herself into a BDSM relationship with an older man who was her Master. In a dumb attempt at competition we also declared ourselves a Master/slave knowing precious little what that really entails. I continued to spank my girl for infractions either real or imagined with varrious impliments of dubious quality.
The breaking point at this stage was when this girl was given to me for an evening as a birthday gift. Spanking, sex, and BDSM abounded in a banner evening of my young life, but it also brougt about a realization for myself and my future wife. We were not a Master and slave.
As the years and our relationship progressed with intermitant foreplay spankings and some degree of swinging, I was what she would eventually call her "Daddy" because I found it very arrousing and we really didnt know another way. This part of our relationship lasted for years through my college career, our marriage, and the birth of our daughter all the way up until last month.
Though my wife has a better grip on the reasons why, we determined that a more structured and loving form of BDSM was needed in our relationship. W/we decided that it was time for her to be my collared submissive but not a slave, she was my wife, lover, and littlemiss, I was her Sir. It was fitting. she would not be spanked for punnishement, because I could not see myself trying to modify her personality which I loved and valued so much and that spanking is very closely linked to sex in both our minds. what she needed was a way to release the tension and pent up emotions which acrued in her daily life. I needed a way to assert my dominance and love. It was a perfect fit and the past two months of our life have been very fulfilling and both emotionally and sexually.
Now that you know the back story, you can better understand who I am what what makes U/us tick.

And So it Begins

If you are reading this blog, the odds are that you have read the little miss spanking journal which is regularly posted by my lovley submissive wife. My name is John and I am the fortunate man who gets to regularly redden her lovley rear. This blog is my opinions, views, memories, and a companion piece to my lovley companion.
Where my wife usually discusses how and when she is spanked and her feelings about it, I believe it would be pretty monotonous for me to discuss only the act of spanking itself. There are only so many ways a person can discribe the act of applying implements to the bottom of a submissive.
So upon the urging of my sub/wife and some people W/we know (Yes Samantha I mean you) I begin this blog. Happy Spanking.